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I could never be a doctor. No offense, but I don’t wanna be around most of y’all when you’re healthy and well. Being at your beck and call when you’re sick, disgusting, and hacking up phlegm has NO appeal whatsoever.
ButifIhadtobeadoctor,I’dprefertobeanautopsydoctor.Talkaboutapressure-freejob:What’stheworstthatcouldhappen?Youneverhavetodeliverbadnewstoagrievingwidow!Nobodycaresifyouhavelousybedsidemanners!(Andbestofall,whoknowswhatgoodiesyoumightfindinyour“patient’s”pockets?)
Apoliticalautopsyiseerilysimilartoamedicalone—completewiththepostmortemgraft:Theorganizationconductingtheautopsy(almost)alwayswantsmoreworkfromtheclient(cha-ching!),soanawfullotofits“conclusions”willdovetailnicelywiththeservicesit’stryingtoupsell.
AndI’mnotsayingit’sdoinganythingunethical.Sometimes,that’sjusthowitviewstheworld.Eitherway,ifyouhireafirmthatspecializesinPRtoconductyourautopsy,it’llprobablypointtoPRproblems.Ifitspecializesingrassrootsactivism,it’llhoneinonthat.It’sanimportantcaveattokeepi
