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I was watching and re-watching hilarious videos of Hezbollah members having their scrotums blown off by 1990s technology as beepers in their front pockets detonated, when my phone blew up with news of a bomb allegedly found in a car near the Nassau Coliseum. That’s where Trump is giving a speech tonight on Long Island.
FACT-O-RAMA! Atleast12membersofHezbollahweresenttotheir72virginssanstesticles.
ThisistobeTrump’sfirstbigrallysinceaDemocrattriedtoshoothimonhisowngolfcourse,markingthesecondattempttokillhim.Orthethirdattempt,ifwecountthePakistaniclownwithtiestoIranwhowasjustbustedforplanningtokillTrump.I’mnotcountingtheallegedexplosivesfoundattonight’srallyyet,asthathasn’tbeenconfirmed.
FACT-O-RAMA! NassauCountyPoliceCommissionerPatrickRyderassuredthenationthatNassauColiseum“willbethesafestplaceinthecountryonthatday,Wednesday.”
IftheDemocrats,deepstate,andunipartyaresosecurewiththeircandidate,whydotheywanttokillTrump?Becausetheyknowtheyarelosing.Also,communistsbelieveassassinatingTrumpisnoto
